This is something that I needed to get off my chest for a few months now.

Depression isn’t something that “just makes you sad”.  It steals your time, your energy, your drive, your motivation, your life, your friendships, your well being   It rips out your core and leaves you an empty shell; going through the motions of things you once found fun, trying to piece together a life, trying to understand what is even wrong.

Depression didn’t just steal my drive for cosplay.  It stole my fun at conventions, the friendships connected to the hobby, the need to express my creativity… nothing was as fun as I remembered it.  And sometimes, it wasn’t even fun at all.

These photos, or lack of good photos, show just how much can happen in a year.

It shows how much can happen in just four months.  How something as silly as late night chats on skype, starting a webcomic, reconnecting with old friends, trying to make something out of a miserable crippling depression… can really change your outlook on things.

This year… I was able to break at least a little out of my depression. But you can see just how drastic things took in four months.  I had FUN at a convention for the first time in what felt like YEARS;  Anime Expo triggered something in me.  I met people I didn’t think I would… and look where I am now.  My hobby since I was 14 is FUN again.

And don’t you ever let someone tell you that being old means you can’t have fun anymore.

And don’t you ever believe you can’t get out of your depression… things can be FUN AGAIN.

(thanks to everyone in these photos, and to everyone who I left out because I don’t have any good photos at ALL.  I didn’t bother booking any good photos this year because I really didn’t have a reason to until as of late.  sorairo-days, extremenikita, hibrrry, Shannon, Riley, thevvioletprince, kitarinastala I have no good photos of us saved on my computer, twigs-brah, burrenbari, sheepskin, zippyc, saturdaithe14th, mini-mosca, kevinsurlthatineverremember, cuckoobanaynays, everyone… just everyone)

And for good measure, I’m going to throw in this:

image

Thank you.

    1. put-on-yo-war-paint reblogged this from junkoandmukuro-hasmoved
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    5. awkwanaut reblogged this from incredibeard and added:
      gosh what a good karin
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    13. kitarinastala reblogged this from chularin and added:
      Count to ten.
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    15. incredibeard reblogged this from chularin and added:
      This is a really good post though? Like, wow.
    16. mmysbathotw reblogged this from chularin
    17. chularin reblogged this from chularin and added:
      My end of the year review and stuff. Wow I’m not very good at anything and for that I’m sorry.
    18. verrypoo said: I’m so happy I met you at AX this year. You’re a beautiful and amazing person and I was so happy to see how nice you were. I’m still shy around you and I’m sorry (anxiety sucks man ;u; ) but I just…meeting you was such a highlight of the year.